i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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