I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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