I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
