Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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