Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
