I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
