lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Is Oprah even human
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
