I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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