why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize