im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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