Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize