Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
