Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize