i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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