I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Randomize
