yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
