I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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