so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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