All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He uses pillows to masturbate.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
sarcasm needs its own font
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
