let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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