Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
The uberlube is also flammable
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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