my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I feel like a drive thru vagina
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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