Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize