dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
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