apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
