If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
