I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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