it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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