You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You may now shotgun with the bride
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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