can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
