I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
