how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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