Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
