I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
she pinky promised me she was 18
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
