And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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