OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize