school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Randomize
