You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
