OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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