I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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