hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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