There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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