i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
