Welp...herpes.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
