Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
