I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize