Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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