He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
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