you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
