whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
