We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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